One Of My All-Time Favorite Headlines

Man charged with burglarizing Wrigleyville apartment while on parole for a 2020 burglary he committed while on parole for a 2017 burglary he committed while on parole for a 2016 burglary

Give him credit for being consistent. You have to read the story to understand that even by the rock bottom low standards of Chicago joggers, James Walker is stupid. Here are some examples:

He was on parole for that case when Chicago cops arrested him for burglary again in August 2017. Witnesses reported seeing him force open a window to enter an apartment in the 5000 block of North Glenwood. CPD arrived just as Walker was leaving and arrested him after a brief foot chase.

After the cops discovered two MacBooks inside his backpack, Walker allegedly admitted that he stole them so he could sell them, asking, “How else would I eat?” 

^{https://cwbchicago.com/2024/03/wrigleyville-chicago-apartment-burglary-arrest.html}

This is going to sound awfully racist but perhaps Mr. Walker could try getting a job and buying his groceries like White people? This is the best part…

His next burglary arrest came in early 2020 in Lincoln Park. Prosecutors said video showed him rummaging through a man’s apartment in the 2100 block of North Dayton, eventually leaving with the victim’s credit card.

According to a Chicago police report, Walker took the man’s credit card to a Metro PCS location and used it to pay his own phone bill. Fortunately, Walker was still on parole, so police had no trouble finding him when he showed up for an appointment with his parole officer.

He used a stolen credit card to pay his own phone bill because how would they possible trace that back to him?

It is truly amazing that these people somehow survive to adulthood when they are this stupid. Our foolish altruism has created so many safeguards in society that people that are literally retarded like James Walker are kept alive so they can commit crimes.

I want to add two bonus stories from CWB Chicago, these are just gold….

Woman used frying pan to break out windows on a Red Line train, Chicago police say

America clearly needs common sense frying pan control.

CPS student brought loaded machine gun to school, prosecutors say

He looks like a 34 year old high school senior and he is almost as smart as James Walker.

A Chicago Public Schools student has been detained as a safety threat after he allegedly brought a loaded machine gun into the facility. Roger Roache, 18, is the second high school student to be charged with possessing a machine gun inside a Chicago high school since March 20.

In two Chicago police reports provided to CWBChicago, officers said Roache entered Collins Academy High School, 1313 South Sacramento, around 8:10 a.m. on Tuesday and went through the security checkpoint. A security officer confiscated Roache’s backpack after a security screening produced an image appearing to show a firearm inside the bag, according to the reports.

The officer secured the bag and escorted Roache to the dean’s office. They then contacted Collins’ school resource officer, a Chicago police officer stationed on the campus.

Inside Roache’s bag, officers allegedly discovered a loaded Glock 17 handgun with an auto-fire switch and a 30-round magazine. He told officers he didn’t know the gun was inside the backpack, according to the reports. Later, while an officer’s body camera was recording, he described the black and tan firearm and said he knew it had an auto-fire switch, the reports said.

The old “I didn’t know I had a Glock that I just described for you in my backpack” defense. This soon to be graduate has a bright future ahead of him, either as a lifelong resident of the Cook County jail or as a permanent resident of a local cemetery. You will be surprised to learn that Collins Academy High School is quite diverse.

A school that is 93% black, 6 % mestizo and 98% of students are from low-income families? The pictures of his “school” that I saw look like a low level penitentiary, so it will be an easy transition for most of their student body to go from “school” to prison.