Sent by a reader and this happened in Florida because of course it did.
Jakiela Shagale Mobley certainly sounds like someone that would a) have a lengthy criminal record and b) assault her own mother with grits. I certainly hope they were not instant grits.
Her defense was that her mama hit herself in the face with grits but the cops weren’t buying that story.
“Due to the victim having grits on her face which match the ones on the counter, and the unlikelihood of the victim hitting herself in the face with grits, I placed the defendant under arrest for [battery] and transported her to the Marion County Jail.”
They matched the grits on the counter? Did they do on-the-spot forensic analysis for comparison? That is some solid police work.
You couldn’t pay me enough to respond to calls like this all day.
It’s obvious you haven’t responded to those calls.
Your picture of the kitchen ( clean and home- like) proves it.
Yeah I didn’t put a lot of effort into the AI prompt
Grits ‘n sheeit.
We waz clownz.
Sheeit! “White peepo be jelus beecuz we niggas be seezoning dem grits real good beefo we throws dem at our mamas!
For a minute there I thought that monkey had his dick in the grits…
Great minds think alike. You and I had the same take about 5 minutes apart. Now I’m laughing ever harder, that I wasn’t the only one who thought that.
At first glance scrolling quickly by the image, I thought the monkey on the right had it’s dick in the bowl of grits. Then I realized it was a wooden spoon. Honestly, it was a bit funnier thinking AI produced a monkey with a 12″ pecker that was just randomly fucking his grits (muh dick/muh grits…or something). The more I think about it, the more I’m laughing. And then I saw the bunch of bananas, and really lost it.
We probably couldn’t ever live in the same AO because we would either always be laughing or ruling the world…
So this is what a gritty crime story sounds like.
Ya, with her criminal history, she is liable to turn into a cereal killer.